Tuesday, March 9, 2010

My Momentarily Definitive Coen List: #10

Why so serious?

Once upon a time I discretely overheard bad whisperings regarding the romantic comedy Intolerable Cruelty, and henceforth, never figured myself to be one who would enjoy that specific time witnessing that story. Oy Vay! How wrong the whispers of times gone by were!

Oh, you. You just couldn't let me go, could you? This is what happens when an unstoppable force meets an immovable object. You are truly incorruptible, aren't you? Huh? You won't kill me out of some misplaced sense of self-righteousness. And I won't kill you because you're just too much fun. I think you and I are destined to do this forever.

These words could be the brooding philosophical debate of the Batman and the Joker, or it could be the evocative flirtation of two supreme forces in world of pityless inconsequenciality.

Our protagonists are two perfectly opposing forces; a divorce lawyer and a gold-digger. Plot the two in the real world and you've got the recipe for 90 minutes of vomitting up chunks of narcissistic puss-covered twinkies. But the Coen Brothers are masterful puppet masters. They pluck up our morally deficient specimens, and plop them smack dab into a world of relativistic nominalism. Nothing really matters.  

You'll hunt me. You'll condemn me. Set the dogs on me. Because that's what needs to happen.

Our protagonist friends are set free to be as vile as their putrid little hearts desire. The only rule is to experience as much emotion in any given instant as possible. Try it! It's blissfully intoxicating! As you purview the flick, ask yourself in every scene, 'what's the action that would lead to the most emotional response possible?' More than likely, our silver screen friends will execute your thoughts with sudden executional fortitude!  

They'll lie to each other, steal from each other, try to kill each other, but who cares? Why should those things keep them from a happy ending?  They're beautiful people, so let's see them end blissfully happy in each other's embrace. That's what I want to see.  That's what they want.  Win-Win-Win.  Everyone wins. 

This is a film that never second guesses itself. It knows its place in the world.  It's a comedy. It's a romance. It's a popcorn flick.  It's not reality. It's not a reflection of life. Man alive, this little movie would do well in Socrates book, for what other film 'knows itself' any better?  

Maybe you want to read the instruction manual first. 

P.S. Why waste precious picture space not showing Billy Bob Thornton in a big cowboy hat?  It's a big hat! It's funny.

P.S.S.Bonus: Slingblading Billy Bob for the triple-mega-action win!

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