In Haste: Uncle Boonmee Who Can Recall Past Lives

There's some crazy looking, red-eyed monkey-men ghosts in Uncle Boonmee Who Can Recall His Past Lives. There's also a fair amount of still photography, slow conversations, television watching, and catfish sex in the flick.

I've been contemplating to myself, demanding, 

Dante, you sir, must decide what you think of this here film. 

You must, you must, you must! 

But I just can't seem to come to any consensus.

From what I can gather, the film is looking notsomuch at the "lives" of Mr. Uncle Boonmee, but rather, at the soul of Thailand. I think that's the point. All the different iterations of being that the consummate Thai soul has been about. When I think about the film with that lens, it's pretty interesting, right?

Right?

Li'l baby Willems

And let us not forget that those first few scenes with the red-eyes were legitimately creepy. I was taken aback, somewhere between fear and intrigue. Good stuff, I reckon...

...but then the red-eyes come into the light, and it just looks like a dark skinned Willem Dafoe conceived by a herd of evil marmosets. That kinda killed the magic for me, like walking behind closed doors at Disneyland. It ain't worth it.

I also cannot not speak of this bestiality incident. I found it to be an unpleasant experience. Simply put, I'd rather not behold such visions.

So where does that leave me? What am I supposed to do with this? 

(you must, you must, you must!)

Thankfully, I was freed from my own drilling conscience of concerned decision-making by today's spoonful of politics. I must briefly explain.

Rick Santorum is the new GOP front-runner. Good for him. Apparently, this week the military just made some sort of executive decree that women can now fight in more active ways in military service. Mr. Santorum is frustrated about this. He spoke out against the policy change. I listened to him, and felt like he made some rather realistic concerns come to the surface. I thought that maybe he had a point... but then I heard an army general speak of the reasons for the policy change. They sounded legitimate too.

Then I blinked. And blinked again. Once more for good measure. 

With my eyes sufficiently lubricated, I could now think clearly. I don't know a thing about fighting wars in the modern age. How could I? Maybe Mr. Santorum knows more than I. Maybe not. Maybe he just feels like he needs to take a stance on it because he's seeking the highest office in America. He is setting himself up to be a leader, so he has to have a strong opinion on everything, right?

I think not. 

Perhaps we should feel free to not have an opinion on every topic under the blue sky. As for women fighting in combat, I hereby raise my hand as one who knows not any answer. I feel comfortable with that decision.

As for Uncle Boonmee Who apparently Can Recall His Past Lives, I don't have a verdict.

Some stuff happens, and then it's over. Who am I to judge?